Saturday, December 10, 2016

Published December 10, 2016 by Knowminfo with 0 comment

Funny status for whatsapp

  • To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
  • Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
  • Eat right, exercise, die anyway.
  • Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
  • The real reason women live longer than men because they don’t have to live with women.
  • Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
  • Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
  • By the time a man realizes that his father was right, he has a son who thinks he’s wrong.
  • No, I’m not feeling violent, I’m feeling creative with weapons.
  • Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.
  • Laugh at your problems, everybody else does.
  • Some people should just give up at engineering or medical. Like I have!
  • God is really creative, I mean...just look at me :P
  • Awesome ends with ME and Ugly starts with U.
  • Just saw the most smartest person when I was in front of the mirror.
  • I love my job only when I’m on vacation.
  • We live in the era of smartphones and stupid peoples.
See also Romantic status for whatsapp
  • Facebook account for sale, Friends included.
  • Why do women always ask questions that have no right answers?
  • The winner of the rat race is still a rat.
  • We live in the era of smartphones and stupid peoples.
  • Doing nothing is very hard thing to do…you never know when to finish.
  • I love my job only when I’m on vacation.
  • Awesome ends with ME and Ugly starts with U.
  • Just saw the most smartest person when I was in front of the mirror.
  • God is really creative, I mean...just look at me :P
  • My study period = 15 minutes. My break time = 3 hours
  • I'm not lazy, I'm just on my energy saving mode.
  • I look at people sometimes and think ….. Really?? That’s the sperm that won.
  • God made everything that has life, rest everything is made in China.
  • Whenever i have a problem, I just sing, Then i realize my voice is worse than my problem.
  • If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
  • Women should not have children after 20. Really… 20 children are enough.
  • That awkward moment when you realize that 'Deleting History' is more important than 'Creating History' nowadays.
  • If you can't Change a Girl.....Change the Girl.
  • When I’m on my death bed, I want my final words to be “I left one million dollars in the…
  • I think my iPhone is not working. I pressed the home button and I’m still at school.
  • I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice.
  • If you do a job too well, you will get stuck with it.
  • I am willing to make the mistakes if someone else is willing to learn from them.
  • We are all part of the ultimate statistic – ten out of ten die.
  • I love to give homemade gifts. Which one of my kids do you want?
See also Attitude status for whatsapp 
  • There are two kinds of people who don’t say much: those who are quiet and those who talk a lot.
  • I’m in shape. Round is a shape isn’t it?
  • Without ME, it’s just AWESO.
  • There are no winners in life... only survivors.
  • Don’t steal. That’s the government’s job.
  • I have all the money I’ll ever need – if I die by 4:00 p.m. today.
  • Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.
  • Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
  • We all have that one skinny friend that eats more than fat person.
  • Everyone has an annoying friend. If you don’t have one, it’s probably you.
  • life is short…smile while you still have teeth.
  • Why is a newspaper ten times more interesting when somebody across the table is reading it?
  • When a woman says WHAT? Its not because she didn't hear you. She’s giving you a chance to change what you said.
  • How do people write an auto biography? I can barley remember what I had for lunch yesterday.
  • Dear Google, Please stop behaving like a GIRL. Will you please allow me to complete the whole sentence before you start guessing & suggesting.
  • A little boy asked his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?” Father replied, “I don’t know son, I’m still paying.”
  • Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
  • I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
  • Seeing a spider is nothing. The problem is when it disappears.
  • I would probably die of sleep deprivation if Facebook added a dislike button
  • Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
  • Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
  • I don’t have a beer gut, I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs.
  • Dogs have masters. Cats have staff.
  • By the time you learn the rules of life, you’re too old to play the game.
  • Our generation doesn’t knock on doors. We will call or text to let you know we’re outside.
  • After (M)onday and (T)uesday even the week says WTF !!
  • Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.
  • The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.
  • My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
  • I may be fat, but you’re ugly – I can lose weight!
  • We buy things we don’t need, with money we don’t have, to impress people we don’t know.
  • You know you’re ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera.
  • I’ve been using Google for 10 years and I have no idea who uses the “I’m Feeling Lucky” button.
  • I want to change my name on Facebook to “No One,” so when I try to add people, it will say, “No One wants to be your friend.”
  • Reason why I never let my girlfriend touch my phone. I don’t have a girlfriend.
  • When I’m on my death bed, I want my final words to be “I left one million dollars in the...
  • Everyone has an annoying friend. If you don’t have one, it’s probably you.
  • We all have that one skinny friend that eats more than fat person.
  • I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice.
  • I think my iPhone is not working. I pressed the home button and I’m still at school.
  • Life is short... smile while you still have teeth.
  • If you can't Change a Girl.....Change the Girl.
  • That awkward moment when you realize that “deleting History” is more important than “creating History” nowadays.
  • Women should not have children after 20. Really… 20 children are enough.
  • If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
  • Fart when people hug you. It makes them feel strong.
  • I find it so inspiring to watch people lazier then me. I still have much to learn.
  • There’s no such thing as addiction, there’s only things that you enjoy doing more than life
  • I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice.
  • She is so fake that she should have two facebook accounts; one for each face!
  • Dear MATH, stop asking to find your X, she’s not coming back.
  • I'm not lazy, I'm just on my energy saving mode.
  • I look at people sometimes and think... Really? That’s the sperm that won.

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